Child Development, Parenting & Marriages. Oh My!

The past couple of months I've been doing some work for my previous employer.  It's a long story, but I had signed a contract for work stating that I would work until Nov. 2012, but with Clark getting a job down in Kaysville for the summer and then us moving to Twin Falls I had to break my contract.  So to repay them I'm doing some work for them.  They are revamping their website and wanted some "handouts" that would be helpful for people in the community.  They sent me a lot of different topics and I've been finding information for them.  I thought I would share a couple of them with you.  Most of the information are things I've gathered from college courses and my work at the Child and Family Support Center.  The only way I could think to share the document was to save it as a jpeg and upload it as a picture.  I am not "computer" savvy at all.  So I hope you can read it. 

These were just a few of my favorites.  When I'm finished with all of them, maybe I will do another post.  I really love some of the information I found on Parenting.  Children really need our love and support.  They don't need to be harped on and ridiculed.  I find myself saying "no" to Henry and I feel bad.  I don't like saying such negative things to my one year old.  Obviously, if they are in danger then saying "No!" is appropriate.  But I'm going to try to use words besides No.  Children need rules and limits, but they also need love, attention and positive interactions.  And speaking of positive interactions, our spouse needs that too!  I love the "magic ratio" of 5 positive interactions for every 1 negative interaction.  John Gottman is a smart dude.  So I better stop blogging and go give my hubby some positive interactions.

Lovely Sunshine

On days when we are stuck inside, Henry finds entertainment by going in his room and playing with the bin of socks.  He likes to empty it out then fill it back up.  Who needs toys when you have socks.  

Over Easter weekend we enjoyed time out in the glorious sunshine!  Cousin Liza was so nice to take Henry down the slide over and over.  

One day when we were visiting my sister Adrienne who just had a baby, we decided to let the new mom and her baby sleep so I took crazy, loud Henry out for a walk and we found a park!  This was his first time swinging, and I think he liked it.  Or maybe not.  I think he was actually pointing to the swing, and tried to climb out of the swing moments after this picture.  He also just really liked to eat the wood chips.  

My wonderful Sister Allison drove me and Henry home to Twin Falls a few weeks ago.  All the kiddos did great on the 2.5 hour drive!  I was so proud.  Max even set a timer on the ipod so he would know exactly when we would be there and didn't have to keep asking us.  Although, half way through the drive he said he dropped the ipod and didn't know where it was!  Silly kid.  

Since they were only here for about 24 hours we quickly went to see Shoshone Falls on Wednesday before I had to go to mutual.  I love this picture of the three boys looking at the falls.  It also made me a little nervous and anxious.  I don't like heights.  

We played at a park both days since the weather was so nice.  Savannah was such a sweet little girl and just sat on the blanket nicely.  Henry was a monster and was either trying to crawl away and eat gross things or steal her toys (it looks like they are holding hands, but Henry was making a grab for her toy.  Savannah squeaked at him and wouldn't give up her toy to the bully!  Good girl Savvs!)

I'm sure Allison would tell you she had a lovely time in Twin Falls, and it really isn't that bad of a town.  We had fun, even though it was a very quick trip.  I'm glad we had nice weather so we could just play outside the whole time!  When the wind isn't blowing 20-30 miles an hour, its quite enjoyable outside.  

11 months old

Henry turned 11 months on March 10.  That already seems so long ago.  Good thing I wrote down his milestones or I would have no recollection of what they are now.  I definitely lost "memory" brain cells after having Henry.  It's worth it though.  Who needs brain cells, right?  

Around 11 months is when he started to get "angry".  He arches his back and goes stiff or he screams.  They could occur because of various reasons such as taking something he can't have but wants, ie: shoes, books and paper.  All of which he tries to eat.  He is still our little goat.  He is always on the move and likes to push the laundry basket around.  He is starting to learn to climb on and off of things.  When we go somewhere with stairs he b-lines it to them and refuses to leave.  And if we make him leave, he arches his back, goes really stiff, and screams.  He is always moving, but I love when he will just sit for 15-20 minutes just playing with his toys.  It usually involves taking things out of a container and then putting them back in.  

He still takes 2 naps a day with one in the morning and one in the afternoon.  He drinks 3 8oz bottles and has breakfast, lunch and dinner meals with random snacks in between.  If he finds the container of the puffs, he will take the lid off with his teeth and just help himself.  He's so independent.  He also loves Greek Yogurt, Blueberries and pineapple.  Those were some new foods he recently tried.  He has 4 bottom teeth and 2 top teeth.  He has been drooling like crazy again, so I wonder if more teeth are coming in.  His little teeth are sharp and dangerous!  He bites my shoulder all the time, and it hurts! One time there was even a little blood.  Don't put your finger in his mouth or you might loose it.  He has some sharp little chompers.  

He is still a sweet little boy and is generally very well-behaved.  He loves Clark way more than me.  Sometimes when Clark is holding him and Henry has to come to me he cries and reaches for Clark.  I'm glad he loves his Dad.  I think it is sweet.  Clark adores him, and they are the best of friends.  When Clark gets home he will take Henry down stairs in the basement just so Henry can climb up and down the stairs and explore.  It is unfinished (but we keep it clean and actually have a big rug down there) but it's still a dark, cold basement.  I'm not sure why he likes it so much.  But Clark is a good sport and always goes down there with him.  Or if Clark has to move his car to the street so I can get my car out, he takes Henry along for the "ride" and lets him steer the car.  It's things like that, that make Dad's more fun than moms!  But in the middle of the night when he wakes up crying I get to be the "nurturer" and go pick up my baby and cuddle him back to sleep.  Mom's and Dad's have very different styles of "play" and babies need both!  

We had to get a baby gate to keep Henry out of the kitchen because the stairs to the basement are off of the kitchen. At 11 months he still hadn't mastered going down by himself.  

He still loves to stand and look out the window.  On this day he was waving bye to Dad as he went back to work after lunch.  

On Saturday before Easter we had a little party with my family.  My Step Mom has a tradition of rolling eggs down Old Main Hill at USU.  I always hated this tradition when I was a student there and had to fight off the swarms of Seagulls as I walked up the steps to get to class.  I really hate birds, especially when there are hundreds of them eating nasty hard boiled eggs after Easter.  But now that I don't have to deal with the birds, it's fun to watch the kids roll the eggs and chase them down the hill.  Last year I was VERY pregnant with Henry (I was induced the next day) and Clark went running down the hill to catch an egg and he totally biffed it and rolled multiple times.  He had grass and egg stains all over his clothes and shoes.  This year he played it "safe" and didn't chase any eggs.  All the nephews were sad they didn't get to see uncle Clark roll down Old Main Hill again!

We were in Kaysville for Easter Sunday and had an egg hunt at the Pierson's.  Henry found the $20 egg!  woo hoo!  We are bad parents and kept the money. I'm sure we spent it on Henry though :)

What apps you got?

{I have an explanation for the title of this post.  It's not that I have horrible grammar, although that might be kind of true.  Sorry Dad.  Clark's brother Brad lived in Japan a few years back, and when we were there visiting the little neighbor boy came over with his new ipod and said "Yo Brad! What apps you got?"  Ha ha it made me laugh.  Hence the title of the post}

I'm pretty sure babies these days are born knowing what a cell phone is.  Its got to be in their genetic code or something.  Or maybe it's because their parents are ALWAYS using their phones.  At least I am.  But I'm doing important things of course {checking Pinterest for recipes, checking email, checking Instagram, checking Facebook, taking hundreds of pictures and videos of my child}.  Some of those aren't so important, but whatever.  We all do it, right? Since Mr. Henry loves to "play" with our phones I decided to download a few apps for him.  Fisher Price has some cute ones that are totally free.  Because who wants to spend money on apps for babies.  Not me.  

An adorable picture of baby Savannah and Henry playing with my phone.  They love it.  I also wonder if one day they will laugh at how "old school" my cell phone was.  I can't even imagine what phones will look like when Henry is a teenager.  They've come a long way from the giant brick.  

Henry really likes the Animal app.  It names the animals and then sings a couple songs about animals.  He "dances" when the song comes on.  It's pretty cute.  He also has a few others that sing songs and tell stories.  

So what apps do you have for your baby?  Any fun ones I need to know about?  

And so you don't think Henry plays with a cell phone all day, here is proof we take him outside... or at least in our car.  Clark was taking the ski rack off of my car so he stuck Henry inside the car.  Is that safe?  Henry had fun driving and waving.  

And I just had to share this picture because he looked so cute.  

Free Fun

Isn't it true that most babies love the wrapping paper and bows more than the actual toy or gift?  That was true for Henry this Christmas.  Although, he does love his toys now that the pretty wrapping and bows are long gone.  He also loves his "bucket of lids" as I like to call it.  It is actually an empty plastic baby wipes case and a bunch of random lids.  That's it.  And it entertains him for hours.... okay not real hours but at least 15-20 minutes which is like hours in baby time.  This "toy" is great for fine motor skills {picking up the lids, opening the container} and maybe a little gross motor if they are like Henry and like to pick up the container and dump it out or to lift it to his mouth to chew on.  

The yellow lid is his favorite.  It came from one of those snack "puffs" containers

He likes to empty the container, and then fill it back up again.  As you can see I used random lids from {milk jugs, Gatorade bottles, apple juice bottles, and baby food jars}

As your child gets a little older they can work on their fine motor skills a little more and try to fit the smaller lids {milk/juice} into the slot.  This also helps their intellectual/problem solving skills to think about getting that little lid into that little slot.  Also trying to figure out how to get the lid open.  Henry likes to push the little button and see the top pop open {He doesn't always remember how to do it so its fun to watch him "re-learn" to do it} There are endless ways for a child to play with this "toy".  Hours of free fun I tell ya!  You could even use a utility knife and cut the hole a little bigger to fit the larger lids.  

This activity also reminds me of some other fun ones that are similar.  You can get a bunch of different hinged boxes like ring boxes and hide little trinkets in them for your child to find {be careful of choking hazards of course}.  Kids love opening and closing things {Henry particularly loves to open and close doors & cupboards.  This also provides hours of entertainment for him} so the hinged boxes and wet wipe containers are a great alternative!  

Start saving your lids and empty containers so you can have lots of Free Fun for your little one!

We have a 10 month old

I go a little overboard taking his monthly pictures.  It's easy to do when he is just so darn cute!  

Henry LOVES his Dad!  Good thing Clark was home for lunch and could get Henry to smile.  

Henry is a pro at cruising around the furniture and stooping down to pick something up and then standing back up {while holding on of course}

Still loves his soccer ball and Dad 

Love that face

We often find him doing this face and breathing out of his nose to make a funny sound.  

Tired of picture time.  I can't blame him.  I took about 100 photos.  He is obviously the first child.  He was also mad that he couldn't touch the electrical outlet.  We really need to "10 month old" proof our house.

He had a little piano time to make him happy after the "photo shoot"

Love the tongue.  Maybe he will take after his cousin Max and stick his tongue out when he is concentrating.  

He found my "skier" tree.  My Grandma Emmett has a skier tree and she leaves it up during the winter so I'm doing the same. The pink snowflakes were made by my Great Grandma Fife and they seemed "Valentiney" to me so it's perfect to leave up through February.  After this picture he pulled the tree over and two of the skiers broke... Time to bring out the super glue!

Only because I want to leave something "educational" for you I will list a few milestones babies should be doing in this time frame.  The range is from 8-14 months so some babies will be doing things slower or faster.... It doesn't matter as long as they are doing some of them.  If you see something you think your child should be doing, just take a few minutes each day and work on it!  They will pick it up in no time!  

Milestones: 8-14 months

Language

• Responds to own name when called
• Responds to "no" sometimes
• Responds to simple requests sometimes
• Listens for a few minutes to rhymes and songs
• Looks at books and points to familiar pictures named
• Understands 10 frequently used words
• Points, gestures, or makes sounds to indicate wants and needs
• jabbers
• Tries to say a few words, including dada and mama specifically (Henry says dada WAY more than mama)

Intellectual

• Examines small objects and details
• Experiments purposefully with objects to discover the effects of his actions (ie. a light switch)
• Repeats acts which have produced interesting effects (Henry likes to roll his wooden balls on the wood floor)
• Remembers the location of hidden objects (we can't hide the remote or our phones from him anymore.  He knows!)
• Places a round shape into a shape sorter

Social-Emotional

• Knows the difference between familiar people and strangers
• Gets caregivers' attention and wants to be near them
• Shows parents when needs help
• Plays simple imitative games such as "pat-a-cake" and "so big"
• Shows affection, annoyance, anger, surprise (Henry definitely shows annoyance and anger when he can't have something)
• Observes and imitates the actions of people
• Shows satisfaction with own accomplishments; smiles
• Feeds self with fingers
• Tests caregivers reactions (like when Henry pulls on the blinds after I've moved him away and then he looks at me like "what are you going to do now Mom!")

Motor

• Pulls self up to stand
• Cruises
• Lowers self to sitting position
• Stands alone (Henry can sometimes stand for 3-5 seconds)
• Walks with assistance
• Climbs stairs and other low objects
• Turns pages in a stiff book
• Tosses or throws without control
• Bangs two objects together (Henry's favorite thing)
• Stacks 2-3 blocks
• Uses pincer grasp to pick up tiny objects (or gross things on the floor!)
• Uses index finger to point

 I got this information from the Parents as Teachers curriculum that I used as a Home Visitor.  Sorry it's not online anywhere.  Websites like Parents.com or babycenter.com have milestone trackers you can look at.  I would like to caution parents about looking at the milestone sheets too often.  Not every baby will be doing the exact thing the sheet says they should be doing.  So don't freak yourself out and think your baby is developmentally delayed.  They most likely aren't.  And if you are concerned ask your pediatrician or other child development expert.  Also I would like to point out a common misconceptions some parents have.  When I was working with parents a lot of them thought their child should be talking by age 1.  That is generally when a child says their first word(s) but that doesn't mean they will be saying full sentences.  Even at 14 months they won't be saying sentences.  From 15-24 months is when their language will start to develop more rapidly.  But they will still use "jibberish" mixed in with some recognizable words.  If they speak clearly about half the time then they are fine.  Also, children UNDERSTAND a lot more than they can actually say.  If you feel like your child isn't talking as much as you would like, take inventory of how often you talk to them throughout the day (and not the TV talking to them).  I would always encourage my parents to talk to their child, even if it is a tiny baby and you are "talking to yourself".  Tell them what you are doing like "Mom is folding the laundry" or "let's go get something to eat for lunch".  I also feel like people think its a "race" to have their child walking before they are a year old.  That's great if your child has awesome gross motor skills!  But it's also great if your baby doesn't walk until 12, 13 or even 14 months old.  That is completely normal.  As a parent you always want to compare your child to other children their age, but that just isn't fair to your child or to you.  Every baby develops at their own pace.  But I do like to use the milestone sheets as a reference to "activities" I can do with Mr. Henry.  

I hope someone found this helpful, and you were able to understand my ramblings!  I'm not an expert by any means, I'm just using what I've learned in college, work, and real life.  

The Happiest Baby on the Block

Has anyone else out there heard of the book or the DVD "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Karp?  He is like the baby whisperer.  I learned about this gem while working at The Child and Family Support Center as a Home Visitor/Parent Educator.  Luckily for me I was pregnant and also had pregnant clients so we learned about the 5 S's together.  And lucky for you, I will share the magic of the 5 S's.  The DVD is better because it actually shows him doing these techniques on little crying babies and it ACTUALLY WORKS!  He is a miracle worker I tell ya.  The DVD is a little pricey so I wonder if you could check it out at a local library.  I would recommend it if you have a little baby that cries a lot or if you are pregnant and you want some helpful resources for when your soon to be baby won't stop crying.  So this reminded me of a time when Henry was about 2 weeks old and he was just sad and crying and it felt like we had tried everything.  Well turns out we did everything EXCEPT check his diaper.  The poor little guy had been sitting in a wet/dirty diaper for probably an hour.  Sometimes its something so simple that will stop the constant crying.  The 5 S's will come in handy when the "cure" isn't so simple.  

The 5 steps to a calm baby {I'm taking this word for word from the book The Happiest Baby on the Block} The book includes pictures which is helpful.  

The 1st "S"-- Swaddling:
Don't worry if your baby's first reaction to wrapping is to struggle against it.  Swaddling may not instantly calm her fussies but it will restrain her uncontrolled flailing so she can pay attention to the next "S" that will turn-on her calming reflex and guide her into sweet serenity! 

The 2nd "S"-- Side/Stomach:
The more upset your baby is, the unhappier she will be on her back.  Rolling your infant onto her side or stomach will make her much more serene.  Just this simple trick can sometimes activate a baby's calming reflex... within seconds. 

The 3rd "S"-- Shhhh
Shushing crying babies magically makes them feel at peace and back home, but you've got to do it about as loud as your baby's crying and close to her ear...or she won't even notice it.  Use this super-effective "S" to keep her calm throughout her fussy period by using a radio tuned to loud static, a tape recording of your hair dryer, or a white noise machine.  {I'm sure not many of us out there have a tape recorder anymore!  Old School! I have an app on my iphone that plays all sorts of noises like white noise, the ocean and even a hair dryer!}

The 4th "S"-- Swinging
Like vigorous shushing, energetic jiggling can turn your baby from screams to sweet serenity in minutes...or less.  As you support your baby's head and neck, wiggle her head with fast, tiny movements, sort of like you're shivering.  Once she's entranced you can move her swaddled into a swing for continual, hypnotic motion. Make sure the strap is between your baby's wrapped legs, the swing is fully reclined, and it's set on the fastest speed.  

The 5th "S"-- Sucking
This last "S" usually works best after you have already led your little one into calmness with the other "S's".  Offering her your breast, finger or a pacifier will be the icing on the cake of soothing.  You can teach your baby to keep the pacifier in her mouth by using "reverse psychology"-- the moment she begins to suck on the pacifier, gently tug on it as if you're going to take it out.  She'll suck it in harder and soon she'll learn to keep it in her mouth even when she's cooing.  

There you have it.  Simple right.  Okay maybe not so simple when you actually have a screaming baby.  Just keep calm and remember the "S's".  

Things that worked for Mr. Henry:

• The "shhhh" worked pretty well for him.  You really do have to get right up by their ear and make the "shhh" noise.  Henry would stop crying and look at me like "what is that noise!" 
• Henry also liked the "swinging".  He didn't actually like his swing, but he liked the "energetic jiggling".  I would just put him on my legs and hold his little head and wiggle my legs back and forth.  9 out of 10 times it would put him to sleep.  We had a little rocker chair that would vibrate and Henry loved the vibration.  He slept in that thing a lot.  We would also rock him in his cradle at nap time and at night.   
• I never remembered to do the "side/stomach" but I've seen other babies who love being held like a "football".  I'm sure if I had done it with Henry it would have worked.  I mean most people aren't comfortable lying flat on their back so why would a baby?  I actually like sleeping on my back, but I have to bend my knees.  It's kind of weird.  
• Henry never really learned how to keep a binky in and I even tried the "reverse psychology" when I would try to pull it out.  But it didn't matter because he started sucking his thumb around 3 months old and he would soothe himself. 

Dr. Karp says one of the reasons babies cry is because they are born "too soon".  During a training for work we watched a National Geographic Vide called The Science of Babies and it talked about how babies are born before they are fully developed.  The first few months of life a baby is still considered a fetus.  It is a really cool video, and I found it online so you can all watch it too!  Don't you just love educational videos.  I will warn you that some parts are a little hard to watch, at least they were for me.  Especially the part when a baby is born and isn't breathing! Scary.... but I will ruin it for you and say the baby is just fine!  So you don't have to worry when you watch it.  

Henry sleeping on my legs after I "jiggled" him to sleep.  He fell asleep like this a lot in the first few months!  I miss him being that little and just sleeping all the time.  What a fun stage {but also really hard too!}

Can we all agree that Henry has luscious lips.  Very kissable!

Here is a picture I took with my phone of the 5 "S's".  Not the best, but the text is what I already typed for you.  The pictures might be helpful.